Monday, September 08, 2008

Potty Talk

(No, there will be no cursing today. I said potty talk, not potty mouth. And, believe it or not, I rarely curse.)

Call me a prude or too Southern (despite the fact that I live in the midwest and not really the south) but I'm not a big fan of some of the commercials that air on T.V. these days. I believe that subjects like erectile dysfunction and vaginal dryness should be spoken of in hushed tones in the quiet examining rooms of doctors offices, not blared out on television. I have never once sat on a sunny day at a sidewalk cafe with my cute-as-a-button girlfriends (although all of my girlfriends are cute as buttons, I will say that!) and talked gaily about the side effects of our various and sundry birth control methods. While the animated Charmin bears are cute, I have never really put a whole lot of thought into the lint left behind by my toilet paper.
As I was sitting in the loo today (Look! There's my British side coming out!), I pulled off some of the aforementioned Charmin (with aloe! and lotion! and vitamin e!) and noticed that apparently the tree that was ground up to make the TP hadn't been ground up enough, as there was quite a sizeable splinter* left in the middle of one square. I thought to myself, "Hmmm, I've seen commercials where they've talked about how Charmon is soft. I've seen commercials where they talk about how it is absorbant. But not once, in any Charmin commercial that I've seen, have they ever mentioned Charmin's exfoliating properties!"

P.S. I wonder how many Google hits I'll get from mentioning E.D. in this post? Scary.

*The author of this blog reserves the right to exaggerate when necessary to make the story better. For example, the word "splinter" may be used in place of the word "chunk" or "blob" if it is felt that it adds more drama to the story. Thank you.

1 comment:

Flea said...

Oh my! Imagine explaining THAT to your doctor!